What is the probability the father of my baby will be granted partial custody?
Thursday, May 20th, 2010 at
12:37 am
I am currently 30 weeks pregnant and unmarried at the time of conception. The father of my unborn baby claims he wants to be involved but he’s shown 0% effort in the pre-birth process and has made things quite difficult for me. He has recently been arrested for drinking & driving. I’m nervous for my baby’s safety and would prefer that he see her as little as possible until he gets help. What is the chance he’d be awarded any form of custody if he pursues it???
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Pretty slim – he might be awarded supervised visitation, at least at first. But it’s not likely that he’d be allowed to keep the baby alone with a history of alcohol issues. Keep a record of what he’s NOT doing, because that can help you as well.
there is a good chance he will get 50% because that is how the law is now. but keep breatsfeeding as long as u can because while u are breast feeding he cant have her for any more than 2 hrs a day.
Most states try to aim for joint custody. However, if you feel that your child’s safety is at risk then file for full custody when and if he tries to be involved or pursues anything.
If he has shown little effort now…I doubt he will go through the necessary steps to grant joint custody, or even visitation rights. I do think that men do need the chance to become a good father.
He may have issues, but try not to dig his grave for him before he has even had the opportunity to prove you wrong. "Saying" he wants to be involved actually says a lot. But saying and actually doing are two VERY different things.
i think not a chance….you are doing good trying to keep your baby safe keep up the good work
You’re in for a long road ahead, so try to relax and treat yourself gently for now. I was in the same situation that you were, and although things do get tough sometimes, you CAN make it through this.
The first thing you need is a good support system. Friends, family, people who care about you to talk to. Stressing about custody now is not going to get you anywhere. For now, try to build your support system because especially if this is your first baby, you will need it
If you are unmarried, in most cases, you are presumed to have custody of the baby. The best bet for now is to not show your anger or stress to him, because that is the first and best way to see him heading to court. What you will need to decide is whether you wish to collect child support from him, in which case custody will need to be addressed at the time. Remember too that your hormones are going insane right now and you are much more prone to stress.
If he does pursue custody, it is likely that he will be granted legal custody, which means that although you have custody of your child (physically), and he is awarded specific visitation times, he will be legally recognized as the father, permitting him a say in the upbringing in the child’s life. If he has a DUI, you would be able to bring this up in front of a judge if need be.
For now though, try to relax. The most important thing is to take care of YOU for now. There really is no way to tell what road lies ahead for you, and it is no sense worrying about "what could be". This can be a long road (trust me, I’m on it.)
In most cases, to ease your mind, an unmarried mother is presumed the custodial parent. Check the forums for custody in your state and see what the regulations are for overnights with the custodial parent with a child under 3.
I wish you the best of luck. Take care of yourself and be gentle with yourself. Get as much rest as you can- you’ll need it
((((( Hugs ))))
there is no way because if he has a drinking problem and has been arrested for DWI.there is no way he can take your baby .he will have supervise visits he can’t drive with her.you know what when you go to court let them know that he’s been arrested for drinking & driving and you are scared for her safety or maybe a family member can take your baby to him .or for him to go to your house to see the baby and he cant take her no where in the car.if he threatens you or causes any problems call the cops and make a police report and tell them that you don’t want your child in the car with him because he was arrested before (driving and drinking).cause that’s danger to a child.